Jurassic World (2015)

'This would look great in my car'

What brand were those shoes? That's a question that ran through my mind during several sequences that were already impossible enough as it was. I could harp on about the shoes, which I am honestly rather impressed by. Those shoes that could withstand that kind of territory and dinosaur action without breaking a heel. Wow. I like how one can suspend ones disbelief about dinosaurs, but those shoes just makes one sigh into the heavens. Or at least that's what I've gathered from the general consternation that's surrounded the film where Bryce Dallas Howard has had to go out and say she chose to wear them.

I'm not surprised she did.

If the shoe fits.

It's twenty-two years later. The park is thriving, though apparently the general public are unimpressed by dinosaurs these days. They want bigger and better, or at least that's what the people who are funding it seem to think. So they've genetically engineered one and done some serious 'I am God' stuff creating this super-monster dinosaur who's been all alone in it's big old cage for it's entire life. Of course it'll be alright - they've got full control on this animal. We've got one woman who's in control of the numbers, though not in control of that one sweaty raptor trainer 'I'm the alpha' bloke. She needs him to take a proper look at the new and improved beastie for security reasons.

You know where it's headed and of course we've got some humans thrown in the mix as well being humany with their domestic problems to underscore how human they are - sibling issues, divorce and 'I don't like you because you're all sweaty and Chris Pratt'.

Jurassic World wasn't a film I ever expected to surpass Jurassic Park - - - and it didn't. It doesn't mean it's a terrible film. It's a funny action comedy with loads of dinosaurs in it (and Chris Pratt). The sort of film that can be funny when you're sat in a big hall with other people, but will probably not withstand more than a handful of viewings before it becomes a cringe worthy cheese fest. Not that I wasn't already laughing over certain over-the-top sequences. It's a film where one of my favourite characters, personally - was a raptor called Blue, besides the t-rex, of course (name unknown, but I want to call her 'main bitch in charge'). So you get where I'm coming from.

Humanity is one of the problems within the film. It lacks. We've got pseudo intelligent babble, which just seems like they've thrown the original dialogue from Jurassic Park and put it into a blender before serving it up to us again with a big grin. 'This is new' the film tries to say, but you kind of feel like patting it on the shoulder while repeatedly saying 'don't'. Trying to throw in homages by chucking some of the original environment at us makes me feel like the characters from the first film are probably picketing somewhere in the states, all grumpy and caffeinated.

It frightens me that we are the supposed general demographic that are talked about in the film 'they want bigger, scarier, more teeth'. That's what the movie industry seems to think we like, and of course, considering the numbers (one billion in so little time), it seems to be playing off that way (or perhaps the nostalgia might have something to do with it). I do kind of love that part to be entirely honest - 'dinosaurs are enough', which they rather are, except when they're flung at us like a full-on CGI party. I half-expected to hear Oprah shouting 'YOU GET A DINOSAUR AND YOU GET A DINOSAUR AND YOU...' with the amount of them on the screen.

I could of course sit hour upon hour explaining why the original is better, but that's just futile. Jurassic World is a fun adrenaline romp riddled with dinosaurs. That's it. Nothing wrong with that.

5/10